12 Traits Narcissistic Pennsylvanians Frustratingly Have

Spending time with someone who always has to be right, always wants the spotlight, or never seems to care how others feel is exhausting. You might wonder if you’re dealing with a narcissist—and honestly, it’s a fair question.

Narcissistic traits can be confusing and hurtful, especially when they show up in someone we love.

We’ll break down some common behaviors that Pennsylvanians—and Americans across the country—with strong narcissistic tendencies often show.

It’s not about judging—it’s about understanding what might really be going on underneath the surface.

A Quick Note Before We Start

Before jumping into these traits, it’s important to remember that not everyone who shows one or two of these behaviors is a narcissist. Everyone has moments when they mess up, act selfish, or crave a little extra attention.

That’s just being human.

“Narcissist” is a word people throw around a lot these days, but real narcissism—known as Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD)—is a mental health condition.

It’s diagnosed by a licensed professional using specific criteria, and it’s not just about being confident or having a big ego. People with NPD often deal with deeper struggles involving self-esteem, relationships, and emotions.

If you’re curious about what NPD actually involves, the American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5) lists the official signs. You can read more about it through the Mayo Clinic’s overview on Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

What you’re about to read isn’t to label anyone—it’s just meant to offer a possible explanation for some common patterns you might notice in a difficult relationship.

Always Talking About Themselves

Have you ever had a conversation with someone who just won’t stop talking about themselves? That’s a classic narcissist move.

No matter what the topic is, they’ll find a way to make it all about them. You could be talking about your weekend, and somehow, they’ll twist it into a story about their “amazing” life.

Narcissists love to be the center of attention. If you say something exciting, they’ll often jump in to top it.

You say, “I got a promotion!” and they’ll say, “Oh yeah? I’ve had three this year!”

They want to win the spotlight every single time.

The frustrating part is that they often don’t even realize they’re doing it. It feels like they’re listening, but really, they’re just waiting for their turn to talk again.

It can make you feel invisible, like your thoughts don’t matter.

Never Saying Sorry

Narcissists struggle with two words that mean a lot: “I’m sorry.”

Even when they mess up big time, they’ll find a way to dodge responsibility. They might blame you, someone else, or even the weather—anything but admitting they were wrong.

Why is that?

Well, saying sorry means admitting they aren’t perfect. And for a narcissist, being perfect is part of their whole identity. They want everyone to think they’re amazing, so admitting a mistake threatens their ego.

This can be super frustrating if you’re trying to fix a problem with such a person. You might be ready to move forward, but they’ll keep twisting things around until you feel like you’re the one who should apologize.

It’s exhausting.

Constant Need for Praise

Everybody likes a compliment now and then, but narcissists take it to another level. They don’t just enjoy praise—they need it to function.

If they’re not being admired, they get moody, cold, or even angry.

They’ll often fish for compliments in really obvious ways. Maybe they brag a little too much or ask questions like, “Don’t you think I did an amazing job?”

They want to hear how great they are over and over again. And if they don’t? Well, watch out.

Their attitude might change fast.

The weird part is, even if you praise them a lot, it’s never enough. They keep coming back for more like it’s fuel. This makes relationships with them feel one-sided.

You give and give, but they just take—and expect you to keep clapping no matter what.

Acting Like They’re Better Than Everyone

One of the most annoying things about narcissists is how they treat people. They often act like they’re smarter, cooler, or more important than everyone else.

This “I’m better than you” attitude shows up at work, at school, or even during small talk at the store.

They’ll roll their eyes at others’ opinions or talk down to people like they’re the only ones who know anything.

And if someone makes a mistake, they’re quick to point it out—but never their own.

This can really hurt the people around them. Being treated like you’re less-than can destroy one’s confidence.

The catch? Even though narcissists act like they’re better, deep down they often feel insecure. But instead of dealing with that, they just puff themselves up and push others down.

Twisting the Truth

Narcissists have a strange relationship with the truth. They’ll lie, stretch the facts, or leave out important details to make themselves look good.

And if you catch them? Get ready for a bunch of excuses or a totally different version of the story.

They might tell half-truths to make themselves sound more successful, smarter, or more liked than they really are. Or they might lie to avoid taking responsibility for something they did.

Either way, it’s all about controlling the way others see them.

This can be super confusing. One day, you might believe something they said, and the next day, it doesn’t add up. Trying to call them out usually leads to more lies.

It’s like being stuck in a maze where the walls keep moving.

Getting Jealous Easily

You’d think narcissists wouldn’t get jealous, right? I mean, they already think they’re the best. But surprisingly, they get jealous a lot—especially when someone else gets attention or praise they think they deserve.

Let’s say your boss compliments you in front of the team. A narcissist might pretend to be happy for you, but deep down, they’re boiling.

Later, they might try to bring you down or do something flashy to grab attention back. It’s not just about jealousy—it’s about control.

This kind of behavior can turn into a pattern. Narcissists don’t like to share the spotlight, and they’ll compete with even their closest friends or family members.

They don’t see life as a team effort. It’s a contest, and they have to win.

Playing the Victim

If something goes wrong, narcissists rarely take the blame. Instead, they flip the script and play the victim.

Suddenly, they’re the ones who were hurt, misunderstood, or treated unfairly—even if they caused the whole mess to begin with.

This move is all about shifting attention away from their actions. If you’re mad at them, they’ll turn it around and make you feel guilty. They might say, “I can’t believe you’d treat me like this,” or, “I guess I’m just a terrible person, huh?”

It’s emotional manipulation.

The worst part? It often works. It’s common to start doubting yourself and feeling bad for being upset after hearing such words.

It’s a sneaky way for narcissists to avoid consequences while still getting sympathy. And if you don’t fall for it, they might throw a fit or give you the silent treatment.

Blaming Everyone Else

When something goes wrong, narcissists rarely say, “Oops, that was my fault.” Instead, they blame the people around them.

A missed deadline?

Someone else dropped the ball.

An argument?

You started it.

They’ve always got someone else to point the finger at.

This habit protects their ego. Admitting fault would mean they’re not perfect—and that’s not something they can handle. So instead, they toss blame around.

It doesn’t matter if it makes other people feel terrible. As long as they look good, that’s all that counts.

Being around someone like this can wear you down. You end up taking the fall for things that weren’t even your fault. Over time, it can mess with your head and make you question yourself.

Never Really Listening

Talking to a narcissist can feel like talking to a wall—except the wall keeps checking its reflection. They might nod or say “uh-huh,” but they’re usually not really listening.

They’re might be daydreaming about themselves or thinking about what they want to say next.

This isn’t just annoying—it’s hurtful. When someone doesn’t listen, it sends a message that your thoughts and feelings don’t matter. And with narcissists, that’s often exactly how they see it.

Their needs always come first.

If you try to bring up something important, they might interrupt, change the subject, or even make fun of you. And if you call them out for not listening? Get ready for defensiveness or flat-out denial.

It’s a frustrating cycle that leaves you feeling unheard and unimportant.

Using People for What They Want

Narcissists are often charming at first. They might shower you with compliments, offer help, or seem super interested in your life.

But once they get what they want—attention, money, favors, or praise—they start to back off or act differently.

This is because they see relationships as a way to get something. They don’t always care about real connection. If they can’t benefit from you anymore, they may pull away or act cold.

This kind of behavior hurts. You might feel used or wonder what you did wrong. But the truth is, it’s not about you. It’s about their constant need to feel powerful and important.

Once they feel like they’ve gotten all they can, they often move on without looking back.

Struggling With Empathy

One of the hardest things about dealing with a narcissist is that they often have trouble seeing things from someone else’s point of view.

It’s not that they don’t care at all—it’s more like they don’t realize how their actions are affecting others. Empathy doesn’t come naturally to them.

This can show up in all kinds of ways. Maybe a friend shares something sad or stressful, and instead of offering support, the narcissist changes the subject or brushes it off.

They might say things like, “You’re overreacting,” or, “That’s not a big deal,” because they don’t truly understand the emotions behind it.

People around them may end up feeling alone or misunderstood. It’s frustrating when someone you care about doesn’t seem to care back in the same way.

And while this lack of empathy can be hurtful, it usually says more about their own inner struggles than anything else.

Needing Control in Every Situation

Narcissists often feel the need to be in control—of conversations, plans, even other people’s emotions. When things don’t go their way, they might get upset or anxious.

Control helps them feel safe, especially when they’re deep down dealing with insecurity.

They might try to take charge in group settings or insist that their ideas are always the best. In relationships, they could try to control decisions, like where to go, who to see, or what to talk about.

If someone pushes back, they might react with anger, guilt-tripping, or silence.

This constant need for control can wear others down. It creates an unbalanced dynamic where one person always has to give in.

But the truth is, the more a narcissist pushes for control, the more it often shows how unsure they are inside.

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