15 Manners Genuinely Thoughtful Virginians Were Taught Growing Up
Back in the day, manners weren’t just something your parents nagged you about—they were part of everyday life.
You didn’t leave the dinner table without asking to be excused. You wrote thank-you notes with your best handwriting, even if it was just for a pair of socks. And heaven help you if you interrupted a grown-up while they were talking.
Most thoughtful people today didn’t just wake up one morning and decide to be kind and respectful. They were raised that way, with these lessons that stuck for life.
Saying “Please” and “Thank You” Without Needing a Reminder
If you grew up in a house where Grandma shot you a look across the dinner table if you forgot to say “please,” you know exactly what this means.
Thoughtful adults don’t need a tap on the shoulder to remember their manners. Whether it was asking for another slice of meatloaf or getting help tying your shoes, “please” and “thank you” were expected, no excuses.
And if you forgot?
Well, let’s just say you weren’t getting seconds.
These little words aren’t just for grownups either. Even as kids, thoughtful people learned that using them could turn a boring school lunch into a shared snack or make a grumpy teacher a little more amicable.
Saying “thank you” to the cafeteria lady or “please” when borrowing a pencil wasn’t weird—it was just what you did.
Holding the Door for the Person Behind You
Remember walking into the local library or the old corner store, and someone ahead of you paused and held the door open with a smile? Maybe it was your big brother, your mom, or even that one neighbor who always smelled like peppermint patties.
Thoughtful people learned this little trick early: holding the door open for someone is an easy way to extend kindness to others.
It didn’t matter if the person behind you was your grandpa with his cane or a 20-something with nothing in their hands. Holding the door was just something you did without thinking about it.
And yeah, sometimes you’d have to do that half-jog to catch up when someone held it for you from 20 feet away—but admit it, you still said “thanks.”
Not Interrupting When Someone Is Talking
Back when dinner was eaten at the kitchen table, not in front of the TV, there was one big rule: don’t talk over people.
If Uncle Joe was telling one of his long stories about driving across three states with a broken carburetor, you knew to keep quiet until he was done—even if you were dying to tell your own story about the frog you found.
Thoughtful people learned the power of patience during those long family chats, church potlucks, and school assemblies.
Whether it was a teacher explaining something important or your friend sharing a secret, you knew to listen all the way through.
Cleaning Up After Yourself—Even at Someone Else’s House
If you ever had a sleepover and your mom reminded you to fold your blanket and thank your friend’s parents “or you’re never going back,” you get this one.
Cleaning up after yourself wasn’t just about keeping your room tidy. It meant showing respect for other people’s homes, whether it was your best friend’s basement or your aunt’s fancy living room with the plastic on the couch.
Thoughtful folks were the kids offering to wash dishes after dinner, stacking board game boxes after family night, or wiping up spilled Kool-Aid without being asked.
It didn’t matter where you were—your mess, your responsibility. And if you did it without being told, people noticed.
Writing Thank-You Notes or Messages
Ah, the thank-you note—the slightly crooked card with stickers all over it that your mom made you write after every birthday party.
Even if your handwriting was lopsided and you misspelled “appreciate,” it was the effort that counted.
Grandma kept those notes in drawers for years.
Nowadays, a quick text might replace the paper version, but the heart behind it is the same. Thoughtful people still say thanks when someone gives them a ride, sends a gift, or even just listens during a tough day.
That habit came from years of sitting at the kitchen table with a pen and a reminder: “If someone took the time to care, you take the time to thank them.”
Letting Others Go First Sometimes
If you ever let your little cousin pick the first popsicle or gave your seat to a grown-up on the bus, then you were probably raised with manners.
Thoughtful people know that sometimes it’s not about who gets the best thing—it’s about who might need it more. Maybe you stood in line for pizza and let your friend go ahead because they looked starving.
Or maybe you stepped aside at the school water fountain because you knew the student behind you had to walk further to get to their next class.
It’s these tiny choices that stick with you. You didn’t always do it for praise. You did it because your parents, teachers, or even your favorite cartoon characters taught you it was the kind thing to do.
Saying “Excuse Me” Instead of Just Pushing Past
Thoughtful folks don’t bulldoze their way through crowds. They learned early in life that being polite opens more doors than just charging ahead.
Whether it’s squeezing past someone at a movie theater or brushing by a group of people at church, “excuse me” was the golden phrase.
It’s not about being fancy—it’s about showing you notice other people exist.
And when someone says it to you? It feels good, right?
Respecting Elders, Even When You Disagree
Back in the day, if you talked back to an elder—well, let’s just say it didn’t end well. Maybe it was a teacher, a neighbor, or your great-aunt with the blue hair.
Even if you didn’t agree with them, you were taught to zip it, nod, and save your comments for later.
Thoughtful people still carry that habit. They know how to have their own opinions without rolling their eyes or making a scene by screaming disrespectful words.
Respecting elders didn’t mean you thought they were always right. It just meant you understood they earned a little patience and grace.
Helping Without Being Asked
If you ever saw your dad shovel a neighbor’s driveway “just because,” or watched your older sister stop putting her puzzle together to help carry in groceries, you learned something big: kindness doesn’t wait for instructions.
Many thoughtful people were raised to help out without someone having to beg.
Whether it was picking up dropped books at school or holding a ladder steady while your neighbor hung Christmas lights, being helpful became second nature.
It wasn’t about being the hero—it was about being the kind of person others could count on.
Knowing When to Keep a Secret (and When Not To)
Maybe your best friend told you they had a crush in the fifth grade and made you pinky promise not to tell.
Thoughtful kids knew that some things weren’t meant to be shared—even if it was juicy. Trust was like gold, and once you broke it, it was hard to get back.
But thoughtful folks also knew that if someone was in trouble or hurting, the right thing was to speak up.
They were taught that real loyalty isn’t about keeping secrets—it’s about doing what’s best for the people you care about, even if it’s hard.
Not Making Fun of Others, Even as a Joke
Back when teasing was passed off as “just kidding,” thoughtful kids learned that if someone isn’t laughing, it’s not a joke—it’s mean.
Maybe you saw someone get picked on for their clothes, their lunch, or their quiet voice. And maybe your mom told you afterward, “We don’t laugh at people—we stand up for them.”
Even if they have a good sense of humor, thoughtful people know where the line is. They can be funny without being cruel.
They were the ones during childhood who would invite the lonely kid to sit with them or give a compliment when it looked like someone was having a rough day.
Asking Before Using Someone’s Stuff
If you grew up with siblings, you already know this one by heart: don’t touch other people’s stuff without asking.
Whether it was your brother’s baseball cards or your sister’s glittery pens, thoughtful kids knew that asking was always better than assuming.
Even now, thoughtful people still don’t borrow your charger, your hoodie, or your fries without checking first. It’s about showing respect for boundaries, even in the little things.
And usually, when you ask, people are more than happy to share.
Covering Your Mouth When You Sneeze or Cough
Some kids were raised in homes where if you sneezed without covering your mouth, five adults turned to stare you down.
You learned quickly: elbow or tissue—take your pick.
It wasn’t about being proper. It was about not grossing everyone out or spreading germs.
Thoughtful folks still carry this habit. On the bus, at school, or even outside, they cover up when sneezing or coughing. It’s just one of those quiet, decent things you do when you care about other people being comfortable—and healthy.
Not Being Loud in Quiet Places
Back in the day, if you made too much noise in the library, the librarian didn’t even have to say a word—she just gave you “the look.”
Thoughtful people learned that there are places where you use your indoor voice, and then there’s everywhere else.
Whether it’s in church, during class, or in the waiting room at the dentist, they don’t blast music or shout across the hallway. They know how to read the room and act accordingly.
It’s not because they’re boring. It’s because they were raised to be aware.
Giving a Real Apology
Ever get in trouble and try to mumble out a “sorry” just to get it over with, only to hear, “Say it like you mean it”?
Thoughtful people learned the value of a real apology early on. You owned up, looked the person in the eye, and meant it—even if it was awkward.
They still do it today.
If they hurt someone’s feelings, they don’t make excuses or shift the blame. They say, “I messed up, and I’m really sorry.” That kind of honesty takes guts—but it builds trust that lasts a lifetime.
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