18 Things No True Floridian Would Ever Say

Whether you’re from the Panhandle or Keys, some words and phrases make Floridians raise an eyebrow and go, “You ain’t from around here, are you?”

If you’re a Floridian, get ready to laugh. If you’re a Florida transplant, here’s your Florida Language 101.

“What’s a Publix?”

This might be the most un-Floridian sentence you can say.

If you’ve never walked the tiles of a Publix aisle or experienced the joy of a chicken tender sub, you haven’t truly lived in Florida.

Publix is more than a grocery store. It’s a rite of passage. It’s where you go for birthday cakes, buy-one-get-one deals, and small talk with the friendliest cashiers on Earth.

Ask what it is, and you’ve just revealed your out-of-state status faster than wearing a “Florida 2024” tourist shirt.

P.S.—It’s just “Publix.” Don’t put an “a” in front of it.

“Beachfront Property”

Technically, this is a real term. But the way out-of-towners throw it around makes it feel like a real estate brochure.

They’ll gush about buying “beachfront property” like it’s the Florida dream. Locals, however, know better.

True Floridians understand storm surges, insurance rates, and the difference between the Gulf side and the Atlantic side.

They’re not saying “beachfront” every five minutes. They just say “the beach house” or “we’re near the water.”

If someone’s talking like they’re starring in a Zillow listing, chances are, they just arrived in Florida.

“It’s Humid Today”

Floridians don’t need to point out the humidity. It’s like saying, “Wow, there’s sand at the beach.”

It’s not just humid today. It’s humid every day, and most locals have accepted that their hair will live in a perpetual state of puff.

When someone mentions the humidity like it’s breaking news, locals nod politely, then whisper to each other, “They must be from up north.”

This comment practically has a neon sign that says, “First summer in Florida.”

“The 95”

You might hear newcomers say they’re hopping on “the 95” to get somewhere. But that tiny little word “the” is all wrong.

Floridians just say “I-95,” plain and simple. There’s no article needed.

It’s a highway, not a Broadway show.

Throwing in “the” makes locals chuckle (or cringe) because that phrasing sounds like it took a wrong turn out of whatever hometown the speaker is from.

“Cuban Sandwich? What’s That?”

If someone doesn’t know what a Cuban sandwich is—or worse, mispronounces “medianoche”—they’re definitely not from around Florida.

Cuban food is practically a cultural pillar, especially around Tampa and Miami.

Floridians know the difference between a pressed Cuban and a sad sandwich trying to pass for one in another state. They also know that you don’t mess with the recipe.

Asking for a “Cuban sandwich with extra ranch” is a one-way ticket to being judged by the whole block.

“I’ll Just Walk There”

This phrase earns a side-eye in almost every part of Florida.

Between the sweltering heat, sudden downpours, and occasional reptilian surprises on the sidewalk, walking anywhere longer than a few blocks isn’t the default.

Floridians drive practically everywhere when they’re not exercising.

If you say you’re going to walk “just a mile,” you’ve clearly never experienced a full-body sweat two minutes into your stroll.

“Where Are the Mountains?”

Asking about mountains is a dead giveaway that you’re not a Florida native.

There are no mountains. Heck, there are barely any hills.

Florida’s “highest points” are mostly highway overpasses and theme park rollercoasters.

Mentioning mountains just screams, “I’m not from here, and I’m looking for elevation that doesn’t exist.”

“Winter Coat”

What winter? In Florida, the idea of a “winter coat” is almost laughable.

A hoodie or a windbreaker is about as bundled as anyone needs to get, especially if you live in the southern part of the state.

So when someone breaks out a puffy parka in Naples because it dipped below 65, locals will shake their heads and smirk. They know this person probably flew in from the North.

Except for possibly the northern part of the state, Floridians usually break out the hot chocolate for fun, not necessity.

“Pop”

Nothing outs a midwesterner faster than calling soda “pop.” In Florida, it’s “soda,” and always has been.

Walk into a restaurant and ask for “pop,” and you’re instantly giving away your status as an out-of-stater.

It’s like wearing snow boots to the beach.

Floridians have a lot of soda brands they love—Publix-brand root beer included—but they never call it “pop.”

“Do You Ever See Gators?”

Of course we do. Sometimes in our backyards. Sometimes crossing the street. Sometimes just hanging out near a retention pond like they own the place (because, well, they kind of do).

Asking this question feels like asking a New York City resident if they ever see taxis.

The answer is yes. Constantly.

Locals know not to feed alligators, not to swim with them, and definitely not to treat them like a roadside attraction.

“It’s Hot Today, Isn’t It?”

Much like the humidity comment, pointing out the heat in Florida is pointless.

Yes, it’s hot. Yes, it’s always hot. And yes, we still choose to live here.

Newcomers love to point it out like they’ve uncovered a secret. But seasoned Floridians just crank the AC, grab a Pub Sub, and go about their business.

You’ll hear this phrase from someone still adjusting to the idea of sweating before 9 a.m.

“Y’all Have Hurricanes?”

This phrase isn’t just clueless; it’s borderline offensive.

Hurricanes aren’t a quirky local weather pattern. They’re real, dangerous, and something Floridians prepare for with grocery carts full of bottled water and canned ravioli.

Asking about hurricanes like they’re a novelty shows a lack of awareness about what locals go through every storm season.

Floridians may joke about stocking up on wine and batteries. But they take storms seriously, and they can always tell when someone doesn’t.

“Do You Go to Disney Every Weekend?”

Only someone who’s never lived near Orlando would ask this.

Yes, Disney is magical. Yes, it’s nearby. But it’s also expensive, crowded, and hot.

Locals might pop in for a half-day thanks to a season pass, but few locals are lining up for Splash Mountain every weekend like it’s a hobby.

If someone says this, they probably just stepped off a flight and bought the mouse ears at the airport.

“The Bugs Aren’t That Bad”

Bless your heart. Give it time.

Between mosquitoes the size of helicopters and lovebugs that turn your windshield into modern art, Florida insects are no joke.

Locals know to keep citronella candles, bug spray, and screen doors at the ready. They also know better than to leave porch lights on during certain seasons.

If someone’s underestimating the bugs, they either haven’t been here long, or they’ve never opened their mouth during a summer walk and swallowed one.

“I Could Never Live Here Year-Round”

Well, thank you for sharing.

Floridians love it when visitors enjoy the state. But they don’t need to be reminded that you couldn’t handle their lifestyle full-time.

Saying this sounds like you’re judging their way of life, even if you think you’re just making conversation.

Locals know it takes a certain kind of toughness to endure hurricane prep, alligator sightings, and wearing SPF 50 in November.

“Where’s the Southern Food?”

This one stings a bit. Because Florida is the South, but it’s not always what people expect.

There’s Southern food there, absolutely. But there’s also Caribbean, Cuban, Haitian, and seafood for days.

If you’re looking for grits and gravy on every corner, you might be disappointed. But if you’re open to conch fritters and mojo pork, you’ll fit right in.

Asking this question just proves you’re still learning what Southern means in the Sunshine State.

“What’s a Snowbird?”

Ah, the classic newbie question. Snowbirds are seasonal residents—mostly retirees—who migrate to Florida during the colder months and head back up north when it gets hot again.

Every local knows a snowbird when they see one.

They often drive slow, wear socks with sandals, and ask for directions to the nearest Cracker Barrel.

If you’re not familiar with this term, chances are you’re either new or you are a snowbird.

“You’re So Lucky to Live Here!”

Okay, this one isn’t necessarily bad. It’s just a bit naive.

Yes, Florida is beautiful. Yes, there are palm trees, beaches, and sunshine.