6 Things Mississippians Say That Sound Like Insults but Aren’t

Some of the nicest things you’ll hear in Mississippi can sound like a scolding.

Mississippians know their tone does most of the work, but visitors may walk away wondering what just happened.

Here are the sayings that mean something kinder than they sound.

1. Quit Being Ugly

“Quit being ugly” sounds like a crack about your looks.

Southern Living says the phrase has nothing to do with physical appearance.

It’s what someone says when they’d like you to mind your manners and stop acting inappropriately.

It’s often a mother’s line, aimed at kids running amok.

Merriam-Webster backs the meaning with a sense of “ugly” that means surly or quarrelsome.

Its example is “an ugly disposition,” so the word describes a temper rather than a face.

If you hear it, you’ve been told to settle down.

2. Dope

“Dope” sounds like a put-down, and Merriam-Webster’s first sense of the word is a stupid person.

Its fifth sense is a cola drink, labeled chiefly Southern U.S.

So when it means a cola, you’re hearing a drink, not a dig, in the Southern sense.

3. Hush Your Mouth

Does “hush your mouth” mean what it sounds like?

Southern Living says grandma might whisper it over her hymnal if she sees you cutting up in church on Sunday morning.

Parade calls it a somewhat nicer way to tell someone to stop talking.

The phrase is similar to “quit bein’ ugly.”

So your mouth is getting a warning with manners attached, not an insult.

4. Bless Your Heart

Many out-of-staters hear "bless your heart" as a polite insult.

Southern Living's guide to responding calls the sincere version an outstretched hand, a comforting hug and an olive branch of understanding.

Atlanta Magazine says that in rural communities the phrase usually doesn't qualify as a catty zinger.

It still reads as sympathy there, murmured with hugs and casseroles in funeral homes.

Southern Living adds that a slight change in inflection or volume can make all the difference.

5. Slap Your Mama

"Slap your mama" sounds like the start of a family fight.

Southern Living lists it as a way to describe something so good that you might do something unthinkable or extreme as a result.

It's often used to describe food that's insanely delicious.

There's even a spice named for the expression, Slap Ya Mama Cajun Seasoning.

If you hear it about your cooking, you've been paid a compliment.

6. Sugar, Honey and Darlin'

"Sugar," "honey" and "darlin'" can sound like a stranger talking down to you.

Language writer Ben Zimmer wrote a column on the 2008 Sweetie-gate flap.

In it, he quoted the Chicago Tribune noting that Southerners use such words with strangers so routinely that they would be shocked if offense were taken.

Sweet Words, Sharp Edge

Some sweet words sound kind and still deliver an insult.

Parade says a Southerner who says "Aren't you precious" to anyone but an adorable child is likely full of sarcasm.

Southern Living says calling someone a porch light is a polite and colorful way to say a person isn't very bright.

Parade describes the porch-light type as someone who appears to perceive and understand things but can't.

Speaker and Setting

Some pet names sound warm or condescending depending on who says them and where.

Ben Zimmer wrote that it was hardly appropriate for a presidential candidate to call a female reporter "sweetie," because it risked sounding dismissive or condescending.

He also cited a Detroit Free Press columnist.

The columnist said pet names like "sugar" or "cutie pie" are fine from a grandmother or an aunt.

They aren't fine from a politician, a business associate or a stranger on a bus.

The Redneck Flip

Redneck was an insult in its first known appearance in print.

The Mississippi Encyclopedia dates that first appearance to the August 13, 1891, issue of the Pontotoc Democrat.

The entry quotes Hubert Shands's 1893 University of Mississippi dissertation, which defined it as a name applied by the better class of people to the poorer white inhabitants of the rural districts.

Then the meaning flipped.